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Bootcamp Blues

It's such a great feeling when you have been "selected", "accepted", "thrilled to be chosen", when it comes to groups, committees, cohorts, and bootcamps. We feel special, intelligent, empowered to dive in and work with our 'cohorts' and show off our personal talents. It seems wonderful to be able to learn something that will definitely carry us forward to the next level of skills or pursuits in our evolving lives.

However, after the first week of joining these bootcamps, I will admit, the name 'bootcamp' is appropriate. I joined a bootcamp over a year ago hoping within six months I would have a skill so valuable that I could choose any path I wanted.

We need to be realistic about our real life circumstances. I joined at a time when my family members were very ill. I had no clue how ill. The bootcamp was very kind and generous but they can only do so much.

I unfortunately, missed the deadline to back-out with at least not having to pay the remainder of my fees. So, I decided to trudge on despite having to devote time to family members and try to work a full-time job while living in another siblings home in order to take care of our parent. Yes, in hindsight, I wish I had the courage, the acceptance to back-out of the bootcamp.

I am here and will continue to the end. I may or may not receive the certificate, but I am still learning, I am still finding strategies. The bootcamp organizers have done everything in their power and policies to accommodate me. It is still up to me to get the coding in and understand the concepts within the time allotted.

I have had to reach out to professionals to guide me through so that I am not spinning my wheels on something that isn't necessary. I have had to 'start-and-stop' various assignments, homework, just to jump around and 'start-and-stop' other various assignments, homework and projects. I get super confused about where I am, I still have to stay late at the office since I am catching up from all the work that was neglected during the COVID lockdowns etc.

This is not easy, but I am still encouraged. I have found a great support group to keep me going. I have learned so much about how I learn. I have learned so much on how to prioritize my time. I have had to say goodbye to young students who I used to teach every morning before I go to work. I thought I would be so sad, but that particular niche is eliminating us teachers anyway. Thank goodness I did follow through with limiting my interaction before they forced it.

So, bootcamps are great, they are difficult, they may or may not work for you. You will get what you put into it. You do need to put a lot into it and you do need to find your support group whether it is other students, their tutors, or outside mentors.

I have another 7 weeks to go. I really don't know if I will make it, but I have everyone routing for me.


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